Those of you who read my posts regularly can tell that I’m in idle-author mode. Sporadic posts … posts on inspiration, motivation, clutter-busting … nothing on the down-and-gritty business of butt-in-chair writing.
Sometimes the hat of professionalism gets flung off and I just float. Call it a vacation. Call it laziness. Call it missed opportunity. Call it idea development. Call it healthy. Call it rebellion against the shackles of must-work.
Presently, I’m weighing the merits of two and a half book ideas. One idea has been in the back of my mind for nearly a decade. I even wrote a draft of the story but had to go back to the drawing board when it didn’t make it past my first gatekeeper.
Another idea has been bobbing to the surface of my imagination for maybe a couple of years–relegated to the tank of Wait–while I completed my contractual obligations.
The half idea–and how does one have half of an idea anyway? Is that like being “almost pregnant?” Okay, so it’s Idea #3. There. I’ve stuck the “I” label on it. But I still think of it as a half because it’s shy. It doesn’t want to be closely examined yet. When I try to pull it into the glaring light of let’s-develop-you, it flees back into the mists of dream world.
Now, any and all of these ideas are worth working on, but I’m still feeling rebellious at the moment. I could get busy, but I don’t want to.
The bank account is sinking low. The dogs’ whiskery faces stare up at me every night in anticipation of very expensive treats. I probably need a new computer since warnings about changing Windows platforms are being whispered in my ear like stock tips. Mingled motivations of guilt, work ethic, self-discipline, etc. sweep over me from time to time. I am resisting.
I’m playing at the moment, reading at the moment. Just for fun. The years have taught me that my creativity levels are always better if I take a break now and then. This year, with all that’s happened, has given me an attitude of “I don’t have to and I don’t want to.”
But soon, I’ll have to plant myself in my chair and get busy because even the itchiest rash of rebellion can’t compete with a love of writing that has to do with who and what I am.
The only question is which idea will it be?